You know it's cold when...

A Minnesota Smoker's Winter Lament

You know it's cold when
...the snowflakes that fall gently upon your cheek don't even melt.
You know it's cold when
...the mug full of hot coffee you take outside with you is coffee-flavored ice cream when you go back inside.
You know it's cold when
...you have to light your second cigarette with the burning ember of the first one because your lighter won't work.
You know it's cold when
...you burn yourself and don't even know it until you've been back in the house for 20 minutes.
You know it's cold when
...it takes you 10 minutes to get bundled up to go outside for a 5-minute smoke break.
You know it's cold when
...you stand outside thinking of all the cold comments you can make on a blog post.
You know it's cold when
...you reminisce about the "good ol' days" when it was 20F outside.

And:

You know you're a smoker when
...you go outside to have a cigarette even though it's so cold that freezing to death is entirely within the realm of possible scenarios.